I’ve been feeling like there have been so many battles lately with Nicky. It seems like he wants to do everything differently to me. I know he is an individual asserting his own needs and desires but it is wearing me down. I’m trying to be a patient mom, but I’m failing terribly.
Last night he refused to wear pajamas. He actually figured out how to take them off. He then proceeded to sleep a full, uninterrupted night’s sleep, which doesn’t happen often (but I could also put it down to no screen time and a lot of jumping).
When he woke up he was very cranky, though. I had to read him a few books to calm him down. He didn’t want the breakfast I had made for him but demanded muffins. I explained that the muffins were finished. “Muffin!” he cried dejectedly. He had to settle for a crunchie.
Today was a bit of a road trip day. I had to fetch medicine from the diabetes centre for DH plus drive past him to drop off something as well.
Nicky was okay for the first part of the trip. The drop off went smoothly because he didn’t even get out of his car seat and DH came out.
However the trip was too long and he fell asleep for the second part. Cue more crankiness.
We get there and manage to bag one of those cool golf carts that transport you in big parking lots. In this case it was to avoid a lot of stairs. Nicky enjoyed that. I carry my now awake son to the pharmacy and we receive the medicine. To give Nicky a snack before we leave we buy some biscuits and some juice. They only have tins of beverages suitable for him so I grab some straws.
Now begins the first battle. I want to eat outdoors so that no matter how much mess he makes with the biscuit, it won’t be such an issue. There are some nice tables and chairs outside. Nicky has a tantrum. He wants to eat inside. And he doesn’t want to eat in the car either. After a while of arguing and tears (even though it is outside the two physiotherapists have their windows open and are probably working to the sounds of my son’s argument) we go inside. I go to some nearby chairs but this is just not good enough. We have to eat upstairs in the waiting room where we normally wait for doctor’s appointments.
Off we go and he is happy. I try to get him to eat over the packet. I’m a bit stressed sitting there, rigidly holding the juice to make sure it doesn’t spill, but eventually I relax a bit and check my phone. Nicky munches two biscuits and then announces he wants to go downstairs.
Great, I think, we can go home. I scoop up all the crumbs.
Actually it just means that he wants to eat in the downstairs waiting room.
More tantrums ensue as I take him outside. I’ve had enough of hanging around this place – it’s time to go home. Nicky shows me his anger by breaking the biscuits all over the place. I finish the juice (because it doesn’t have a lid and I don’t want an open can all the way back) and this upsets him even more. I carry my crying kid back to the car. Somehow he gets hold of the remaining biscuits as I am fumbling for my keys and he breaks all of them over the ground.
I make sure he is locked down in his car seat so that I can clean up the mess.
I have never been so happy in my life to get home.
Tantrums at home aren’t pleasant, but in public – they just plain suck.
Later in the day I am checking the medication and I discover that the wrong amount has been packed.
I am going to have to go back to that place.
One thing’s for sure.
I’m not buying any biscuits.
In case you think it’s all tantrums and tears we did have a lot of fun this weekend at an arcade throwing balls and riding bumper cars. These are the moments where I really enjoy Nicky – where he is having doing what he loves – sport and cars.
So I guess that’s what life with a threenager is all about – the ups and downs, the highs and lows. I will cherish the precious moments, reading books, holding him close, watching him drive his cars, splash bubbles in the bath and building things. I will enlarge those times and make them more worthy than disagreements about where we will sit, what we will wear and what we will eat – because in the larger scheme of things they shouldn’t be as important. I just pray for the ability to let God in and create in me a better mom with more patience.